I was taking a rest day in Newport, Oregon just working away in my hotel room when I heard some commotion outside. There was a woman who was clearly upset. Then I heard the word "bike". 

Oh shit. 

I opened the door to find my bike lying on the ground and I could immediately see one bag had been damaged and the latch for the other was lying on the ground. 

The woman had been trying to find who owned the bike but since the spot in front of my room as a handicapped spot I parked in the next spot so she tried knocking on the wrong door. She had gotten the manager to try to find me. 

"I am so so sorry. I backed into your bike. " 

Fuel was spilling out of the overflow so after a few seconds assessment, with the help of the hotel manager, we picked the bike up and I began a closer look at the damage. My pristine donor fairing was scratched up. The tank is scratched. The right mirror was off and the mount and wires broken. The handlebar is bent. The cover on the left pannier had been pushed forward. I'm guessing she backed into my bike on an angle hitting the left bag and pushing the bike forward off it's center stand and sideways. 

"I hold it in high regard that you didn't just drive off. The last person to knock my bike over was not so honorable." I said. She was visibly shaken. I got the sense she was not someone of means but she was kind and wanted to do what was right. 

I looked over the bike. My biggest problem was the right saddlebag. If I couldn't get that latch fixed it would be a real problem.

The mirror mount being bent as badly as it was was also a problem but I figured I could maybe straighten it enough to hold the mirror.

The cracks in the fairing were a real bummer. 

The manager asked me if we shouldn't exchange insurance information. I thought about it for a second but it made no sense to. The bags are unobtainium as is the fairing. Having a competent fiberglass shop repair the fairing would probably cost quite a bit of money and any insurance company would just declare the bike totaled. 

"No, that won't be necessary." I said looking at the woman. "I'd hate to see your rates go up. I think I can fix this."

She offered me all the cash she had which was not much. I looked at the broken latch and figured out it was just the mounting rivets that sheared off. I figured I'd need to get a rivet gun and some rivets and maybe a wire crimp tool. I had everything else I needed, I thought. 

I handed her her money back but she insisted I keep at least $40. I thought that might cover the tools I needed. 

"Ok." 

She told me that if I found anything else to let her know. 

There was a NAPA parts store within a half mile of the hotel so I set off. 

Tools have gotten much more expensive than I remember. The only rivet gun they had cost $90. The wire crimper was another $20 plus the cost of the rivets. All told, it came to about $140. 

I walked back at the hotel and crossed paths with the woman who asked how it was going. I mentioned tools had gotten way more expensive. 

So she insisted I take another $100 from her to cover the cost of the tools. That was nice of her. She still seemed pretty shaken and continued to apologize profusely. 

I told her, "You know. There are big problems in life but this isn't one of them."

"Yes. I know. I've had brain surgery but still ..."

I took the broken bag, mirror, and mount inside and set about to effect repairs. 

I took a closer look at the the bag and to my dismay it had been cracked badly and was no longer structurally sound. 

Fortunately, I always carry epoxy putty with me so was able to patch the crack pretty easily. As any one who has seen my Beloved Blue Oil Burner, this was not the first time I have had to use the stuff. I don't travel without it. Year ago, I patched a fifty cent piece sized hole in an engine case. That repair held for years afterwards. The trick is to clean the surface and the cut off a section of the putty and knead it thoroughly. 

For those interested you can get the stuff at most auto parts and hardware stores but it's also available on Amazon:

I riveted the latch back on which worked better than I had imagined it would and straightening the mirror mount with a vise grip and my Coveted Victorinox Swiss Tool I was able to get it straight enough to be serviceable.

Fixing the broken wires took seconds. 

It's serviceable but my bike is not as pretty as it was. 

I test started it and all seemed fine. "I hope there isn't any more damage." I thought as I left the next day. 

Tom, who has been following me on Facebook for ages, invited me to visit and stay with him near Santa Rosa. "I have a room and a secure garage."

"Excellent." I thought. Tom has the same bike I do. It would be cool to see the two bikes together and maybe even go on a ride. 

He suggested that I go to Yreka, Ca and take Route 3 down to 299 to 36 and then 1. 

These were good roads. Route 1 to the coast is FANTASTIC and reminds me quite a bit of Deal's Gap. 

As I got closer, it got much hotter. I was to take route 128 to 101 and on that ride things got proper hot. The fairing temperature gauge was reading 110. I made it to Tom's in the late afternoon but I had some trouble finding his house. There's an issue with his address that Google Maps doesn't route correctly. Fortunately he put a sign out front. 

I figured the likelihood of someone else in the same neighborhood having their own 16V Flying Brick was unlikely. 

Tom is very kind. He had a guest room all set up. He's on this nice lot next to farmland and a tree lined walking path.

I pulled my gear off the bike and had left the GPS and phone connected to it a little longer than I have before with the bike turned off and for some reason I paid attention to that. The bike battery is quite large and I have never before had the thought, "I shouldn't leave stuff plugged in for more than a few minutes without the engine running." 

Weird.

There are lots of critters in his yard. 

He had the grill ready and made dinner. We sat out in his back yard and watched the sun go down. Hummingbirds were everywhere. One paused buzzing not more than a foot from my face and stared me in the eye just hovering there for quite a while but as soon as I reached to take a camera it was gone. 

The plan was to go for a ride the next day. He was going to escort me on a nice ride down to the coast and from there I was going to head to Oakland to have a short visit with Alan who I have not seen in ages. 

The next morning Tom had coffee ready when I awoke and made breakfast. He joked he was working on his chateau rating. "5 stars. Definitely 5 stars. Would highly recommend." 

We suited up and were ready to go when I turned on the ignition. All seemed good. I noted on my USB charger which has a volt meter on it that the voltage seemed a bit low. I pressed the starter button and for the first time ever, my bike did not start.

It did not even turn over. 

"Shit."

I looked the bike over and tried to think what it could possibly be. This battery is only two years old and is a MotoBatt battery that came highly recommended. I couldn't imagine that it could also have failed. Maybe there was some draw. Could it be possible that leaving the phone and GPS plugged in for fifteen minutes after the bike is off could drain it significantly? That didn't seem likely. 

I had to sadly say to Tom, "It's a no go." 

He has a trickle charger with a BMW accessory plug so I rolled the bike over and plugged in the charger. To my surprise within 30 minutes the charger indicated the battery was fully charged. 

"That can't be right." I said to Tom but I plugged the USB charger volt meter in and it read 12.9V. 

"Hmmm"

The bike started right up and looking at the voltage it read 13.6 which is exactly what it should read. 

I stopped and restarted the bike a few times. 

"Well it seems to be ok. Let's go to the nearest gas station and see how it does." I said so off we went.

When we rolled into the station which was nearby everything seemed ok. I shut off the bike and we fueled up. I went to start the bike and it was dead again. 

"There's an independent BMW motorcycle shop not far." Tom said and I thought if we could get it there that might be a good plan. It may just be the battery has failed since when running the voltage seemed correct. 

I have a bike to bike charge cable which I have carried on my bike since I bought it. I have never had to use it until now. We rolled the bikes away from the pump. I pulled out the cable. It goes from BMW (DIN) accessory plug to accessory plug and is used to charge a depleted battery using someone else's bike. It's not used as a jump start.

He let his bike run at high idle for about 15 minutes and once again the voltage had gone up to around 12.9.

"That's weird." I thought. It should have taken a lot longer. 

On first attempt the bike started so off we went to the BMW shop. It was only about 5 miles down the freeway but as we pulled off the freeway I noticed my ABS lights were blinking. This can happen due to low voltage, which is very concerning. We arrived at the BMW shop only to find that they are closed on Monday. 

Oops. 

I plugged the USB gadget in to measure the voltage while the bike was running and it read 9.8V. 

"Oh shit. Now this is a problem." I said. Without other options we decided to limp back home. 

At the first stop sign, with the voltage continuing to drop I asked him, "Please. Let's go side roads." I could just see running out of juice entirely on the freeway in the baking sun. 

To my relief the bike made it back to Tom's house. We rolled it into his garage. 

I thought it was strange that this had started happening now. I've never before had a problem like this. 

Whenever I encounter a new problem, I try to think back as to anything that's recently happened that was out of the ordinary. I had just ridden through crazy heat but I've done that before. 

The bike was knocked down two days earlier but the bike has been knocked down before. 

But I had the stock battery at the time, not this new AGM (Absorbent Glass Mat) battery. "I wonder if some kind of shock could cause the battery to fail internally." I said to Tom as I started Googling. 

So if the internet is to be believed, a lateral shock such as a knock over can cause the internals of these batteries to fail in a way consistent with the symptoms I was seeing. Distressingly, I then Googled if this kind of failure could damage the alternator and again, if the internet is to believed, the answer is apparently yes. 

"There is doubt. So there isn't any." I said to Tom.

I was unsure what to do. Alternators for these bikes are crazy expensive and I suspect they are hard to find. I thought maybe I could get one from Bud but that might take a while. Tom suggested looking at Euro Moto Electrics. To my surprise they had rebuilt alternators for my bike on the shelf for $189.00. They also had a battery in stock that would work.

"That's a no brainer." 

I called them and I had just happened to call while the Fedex guy was standing in their office. They had him wait and I ordered both alternator and battery and got express shipment.

But I do hate doing this kind of thing. I would much rather have fully diagnosed both battery and alternator to make certain I had a complete understanding of the failure before proceeding, but I did not want to impose upon Tom any longer than necessary. The battery was clearly dead. The alternator was 34 years old. "Can't hurt." I thought. And if it does not solve the problem, I'll deal with it then.

"The package should arrive at the house before 1:15PM tomorrow." the representative told me. Tom mentioned again that there was an issue with the address so I had them add instructions for the driver to call me in case there was any issue with delivering the package. 

That evening we had dinner at an odd little cafe and then spent the evening in the West yard next to the firepit. He really has a nice setup here. I could get used to it. 

The next morning I woke up early and Tom and I discussed the problem with the address. It was not unlike what happened to my cottage when a property next door was split. So I called Fedex to add some additional delivery instructions. The representative added in the instructions and assured me if the driver had any issue delivering the package he would call. 

Tom and I sat out in the driveway under a shade tree and waited for the Fedex driver. At around 11, I saw one drive by and turn in into the apartment complex next door. 

I did not know I could run that fast. Sadly, he was a regular Fedex driver and not an express driver. 

So we sat and I checked notifications. At noon, I saw the notice "Address invalid. Delivery not possible." 

Bummer, man. 

So I called Fedex and through their automated system opted to have the package forwarded to a local Fedex Office location. That seemed to be the best option but at the end of the automated message it said that my id would have to match the delivery address and that only the sender could change that. 

Needless to say, this involved a few telephone calls and some time interfacing with the wider Fedex system. It wasn't clear whether I'd be able to get it. I called Euro Moto Electrics and they were very willing to do what they could on their end. 

Unfortunately, and I did not know this, because I had elected to forward the package to the local Fedex Office location, a hold was put on the delivery and no changes could be made. So at this point all I could do is wait for the text from Fedex and attempt to pick up the package. Maybe since my name matches and I have the tracking email it might be enough. If it was not and the package got sent back to Euro Moto Electrics, they said they would be happy to overnight me the package again to different address if need be. 

So there was nothing to do. I worked on the computer for a while and towards evening I got a text saying the package had arrived. Tom had plans that evening but there was just enough time to run over there to attempt the pickup. 

To my relief, that worked without issue and I now had a new battery and remanufactured alternator. 

The thing I find about large enterprises like Fedex is one has to remember that individuals are constrained by the systems they are forced to work under. Sometimes one is interacting with a human but most of the time the human is just an interface to the larger system. Personal relationship rules don't apply. Often times, the individual one is talking to has no actual power to fix a problem outside of the scripts or systems they are interfacing with. I always remember that and behave accordingly. I've done this since I was a kid which got me into a lot of trouble with my old man who thought this was a very weak and pathetic approach. 

I just don't find yelling at people to be very motivating. 

I set about taking the bike apart to remove the old battery and alternator when I noticed something that surprised me. 

That crack ain't right. This confirmed that the battery was in fact damaged and my best guess is that it cracked when the bike was knocked over. 

This made me feel better about the command decision to just change both.

It did not take me long to get everything apart.

My next problem was how to get the cup off the old alternator and onto the new one. Tom left for trivia night on his GS and left me the keys to his car. I headed over to an autoparts store and bought a 22mm socket and a big strap wrench hoping to could manage to get the cup off.

The problem is the round thing spins when you try to loosen that big nut. Try as I might I could not get the thing to budge. 

Failure. 

Tom knew an independent mechanic he spoke highly of so I suggested maybe we could take both the old and new alternators over there and maybe he could use an impact driver to get the nut off. I was pretty confident it would take something like that to get this done.

When he got back we sat out in the back yard. The sunsets here was kind of dramatic.

The next morning I asked if maybe we could head over to see John, the mechanic Tom knows. Tom wanted to try a few things first. So we tried penetrating oil and heat. There was just no way of getting that nut off so reluctantly Tom agreed to schlep me over there. I had thought it was much closer than it was so it turned into quite a longer effort than I had realized. 

I felt bad about that. 

It was a crazy twisty drive out there. Nice roads. We met John at this shop, which is attached to his house.  He has an extremely well organized complete shop in his garage and is crazy knowledgeable. He had an impact driver but even with that and a large strap wrench we couldn't get it done. The vice was risky because we didn't want to score up the cup too badly. But John had a chain wrench and with a bit of effort by the both of us working together we got the thing apart and transferred over to the new alternator. 

We chatted for quite a long time. Tom brought up the question of my drive train issues that caused me to pause for so long in Billings. John agrees that something is wrong and suggested that the entire read end some off again and everything be inspected again but after talking for about an hour he agreed that it's possible that maybe it could be the shock. I did not know this but there is a failure mode in Ohlin's shocks and I suspect others where over time they can actually lengthen. He strongly suggested I go visit BeemerShop and see about either getting my shock rebuilt or getting a different beefier one. There are apparently some options on the market now for shocks that might be more appropriate for my style of riding. 

I did not know. So I am exploring that. 

We got back to the house, new alternator with the cup installed in hand and I set about reinstalling everything. It took me about an hour and a half to have everything back together and ready to test. 

The bike started immediately but there was this terribly clanking sound. 

"Shit."

Clearly something was amiss. 

So I took everything back apart again and carefully inspected the new alternator. It took a little while but I realized that one of the fins on the fan was bent out of a bit and was hitting the casing.

You can see the little bright spot in the black fin where it was hitting. 

That little shiny groove is where the fan. 

So I spent some time and bent the fan into shape and once again put everything back together again. 

I started the bike and at over 1200 RPMs it shows 13.6 volts meaning that it's charging.

I catch flak for not getting rid of my Beloved Blue Oil Burner and getting something newer. People point out these failures and wonder why I persist. 

I overlooked a couple of import things during the rebuild.

Ohlin's shocks need to be rebuilt regularly. They are not as robust over long term use as I had thought. Is that the cause of my drivetrain weirdness? I don't know. 

It was also probably a bad idea to reuse a 34 year old alternator. However, I do strongly suspect it was the battery that took the alternator out. 

And I should have checked that o-ring under the gas tank. I didn't think to remove the sender and reseat it. That gasoline leak that we uncovered in Billings could have caused a Very Big Problem. 

This latest problem, however, was not the bike's fault. It was knocked over harder than I realized. That's not age. That's impact. 

And if I think about the time, effort, knowledge, and tools I have in support of these kinds of bikes, the switching costs are much higher than just "buy another bike." In addition, when Bad Things happen, with a newer bike I would be in a much worse position to fix things on the road. The electronics have gotten ridiculous. Interestingly, I thought the electronics on my bike were ridiculous when I bought it back in '92. 

So the upshot is, I may be able to get back on the road tomorrow. My plan is ride around relatively locally to see how the bike does and monitor the voltage carefully. If it's solid I'll continue on my journey to San Diego.

I said to Joel in my latest text, "You can image how surprised I was to find my battery cracked."

His reply, "Not as surprised as I will be if a Yermo shows up in San Diego."